The death of Princess Diana in 1997 sent shockwaves through the world, placing intense pressure on the Royal Family to publicly acknowledge the loss. Behind the scenes, however, the family faced internal turmoil as they navigated grief, public expectations, and the well-being of Diana’s two young sons, Prince William and Prince Harry.

According to royal author Tom Bower, in his 2018 book Rebel King, Prince Charles was “paralysed” with guilt in the days following Diana’s death. Bower wrote: “Charles was chanting, ‘They’re all going to blame me, aren’t they? The world’s going to go completely mad.” The Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh reportedly focused on shielding the princes from the intense media scrutiny.

The Queen’s famous phrase “recollections may vary” seems particularly relevant to the chaotic and emotionally charged period surrounding the funeral on September 6, 1997. Bower noted that reports about Charles’s reactions were often contradictory. Some courtiers claimed he delayed traveling to Paris until advised by the Queen, while others suggested he insisted on going against her wishes to bring back Diana’s body.

Media Pressure and Tony Blair’s Involvement

Bower explained that media accounts largely relied on statements from Mark Bolland, Charles’s deputy private secretary, who was at Balmoral. “They either concealed or were ignorant of his reluctance to fly to Paris. As the media’s only ‘eyewitness’ source, ‘Bolland could spin what he liked’, one journalist griped.”

Amid growing resentment toward the Royal Family, advisers turned to then-Prime Minister Tony Blair for help. Bower wrote: “Unexpectedly, they found themselves relying on Tony Blair. The Prime Minister had placed himself in an awkward position, as over the previous months, he had built a rapport with Diana.” Blair and his aides aimed to protect the monarchy from public anger, despite not fully understanding the internal conflicts within the family.

“The courtiers’ initial gratitude turned into suspicion,” Bower added. “Blair did not understand that governments do not own the monarchy.”

The Question of the Princes Walking Behind the Coffin

One of the most emotionally fraught decisions involved whether William, 15, and Harry, 12, would walk behind their mother’s coffin during the funeral, watched by an estimated 2.5 billion people worldwide.

Bower described a phone conversation with Prince Philip: “F** off. We are talking about two boys who have lost their mother.”‘ The Duke of Edinburgh’s intervention was pivotal. During the family dinner the night before the funeral, he told his grandsons, “Well, if you don’t go, I won’t.”

Former Tory MP and royal commentator Gyles Brandreth recalled: “Prince Philip, who had not planned to walk, said to William, ‘If I walk, will you walk with me?'” Ultimately, both boys decided to walk behind the coffin with their grandfather, their father, and Diana’s brother, Charles, the ninth Earl Spencer. Earl Spencer later told BBC Radio 4’s Today programme that it was a “very bizarre and cruel thing” for the boys to be asked to walk behind their mother, suggesting he was misled about their willingness to participate.

Prince William has described it as “one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.” He added: “It felt she was almost walking along beside us to get us through it.”

Blair’s Role and Downing Street Pressure

The Blair government, particularly through Alastair Campbell and Lord Chamberlain Lord Airlie, played an advisory role in the funeral planning. They suggested measures to visibly demonstrate the Royals’ grief, including removing barriers for the public procession, which was ultimately rejected for safety reasons.

Anji Hunter, a No. 10 aide, recalled the urgency of the phone call: “I can remember – it sends a tingle up my back. We were all talking about how William and Harry should be involved, and suddenly came Prince Philip’s voice… ‘It’s about the boys,’ he cried, ‘They’ve lost their mother.'”

Sky TV commentator Adam Boulton added vivid detail, explaining in his book Tony’s Ten Years: “The Queen relished the moment when Philip bellowed over the speakerphone from Balmoral… He was trying to remind everyone that human feelings were involved.”

Long-Term Impact on the Princes

The emotional toll of the funeral has been a recurring theme in the princes’ reflections. Prince Harry, in his memoir Spare, wrote about the bond he felt with William during the procession: “It didn’t seem right that Willy would have such a hard time without me.” William, for his part, has acknowledged the challenge: “There is that balance between duty and family, and that’s what we had to do.”

The experience has had a lasting impact on both brothers’ mental health. Harry has spoken openly about the trauma, while William has highlighted the guidance and support he received from his grandfather, Prince Philip.

When Philip passed away in 2021, both princes walked behind his coffin on its journey to St George’s Chapel. William reflected: “I feel lucky to have not just had his example to guide me, but his enduring presence well into my own adult life — both through good times and the hardest days.”

Context and Legacy

Princess Diana’s funeral remains one of the most-watched events in television history, and the decisions made behind the scenes reflect the complexity of balancing personal grief with public duty. The royal family’s private struggles, particularly regarding the participation of young children, highlight broader issues of media scrutiny, public expectations, and the psychological impact of loss.

The Duke of Edinburgh’s protective intervention and the careful guidance of Blair’s team were instrumental in ensuring the princes’ welfare during the public spectacle, setting a precedent for how the Royal Family navigates grief under intense global attention.

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